The greatest burden a child must bear is the unlived life of a parent.

Carl Jung

Glennon Doyle said during a recent interview with Marie Forleo

‘Our children will only allow themselves to live a life as fully as their parents lived’

Sit with those two quotes a moment.

Our children will only strive for a life equal to ours, and our self-sacrifices can set those standards … well quite low.

As a mother, we model how to live. We model how to love. We model how to care. We model how to know what we want and need and make beneficial choices.

When you become a mother – your baby comes first. Your mission is to ensure your child has every opportunity to be their full self and lead a wonderful life.

Right?

Isn’t that what your mum wanted for you too?

What are we modelling?

What does that really look like?

Putting our children first always. Sacrificing our time and energy to ensure
others are cared for first. Pleasing others, perhaps at the expense of our own wants and needs. Putting our dreams, interests, aspirations on the back burner.

We see mums going to the gym, out to coffee with friends, going away with
people other than their family and we hear tutting. Disapproval.

There’s a shared ‘she’s so selfish’ undertone. I call BS.

This legacy of self-sacrifice. People pleasing. Martyrdom. Bitching about women who are taking care of themselves and being true to their needs.

Where did this come from?

Think about it. Who benefits?

Not us. And certainly not our daughters.

Mothers are models

Mothers model how to live – live your life fully engaged. Follow your passions – forgotten what they are? Figure it out with childlike curiosity and a sense of fun.

Mothers model how to love – start with you. Show yourself love every day. Teach your daughter the importance of self-love and self-acceptance.

Mothers model how to care – start with you. Care for yourself. Pay attention to your body. Respect and accept the cyclic flow of energy and relax. Move for fun. Create a bliss list (a list of things that make your heart happy).

Only once you live, love and care for YOURSELF can you model what a LIVED life looks like.

A lived life – not a burden

It’s our responsibility to not burden our daughters with a legacy of an unlived life. 

Your daughter benefits from your happiness, growth, passion and self-love.

Set the standard for how your daughter will mother. Create a new legacy of a life fully lived.

First – feel good challenge

Want to take better care of yourself and try out some fun activities and ideas? Join the free 7 day First Feel Good Challenge. Your daughter can play along too.